Timmerov's Blog
itunes
seriously apple? don't you test your updates before you release them? fuckers. shit won't start cause a dll is missing. error 7 or 136. the apparent solution is to uninstall everything apple. including itunes bonjour and apple this and that. then re-install itunes. don't panic if it looks like your music is missing. just quit itunes and start it up again. sigh. shoot me with pointy needles from a pointy needle shotgun if ever i ship something that bad. sheehs.
disbook
facebook is a disease.
here's the proof. heh. actually, that's a bit of a creative interpretation. the article cites researchers who modeled facebook as a disease. a facebook user is infected with the facebook disease. they predict the epidemic will end sometime around 2017. thank gods.
curiosity
the other day i described myself as a curious person. which is a delightfully ambiguous statement. and both meanings are true. i am an inquisitive person. i am an unusual person. so one could say i am a double curious person. which again is delightfully ambiguous. i am a curious person for both meanings of curious. i am twice as inquisitive as a standard inquisitive person. i am twice as unusual as a standard unusual person. therefore i am triply curious. and by mathematical induction, i am an infinitely curious person.
virus patent
following up yesterday's post... that's your cue to go read it. back? good. on we go. software patents exist. suppose i own one. and i use a virus to distribute it around my corporate network. hey, why not? it saves me the trouble of having an IT department. and i license the patent to other corporations to install on their networks. so far so good. now say you plug your laptop into my network. my virus install my patented software on your laptop. you go back to your organic corporation. plug in your laptop. and my virus does what it's supposed to do. it spreads throughout your corporate network. causing your IT department no end of trouble. i find out about it. according the court's ruling, i can sue you for the licensing fees to use my patented software. and there's nothing you can do about it. ha ha ha ha ha! i'm gonna be so rich.
gmo's rule
monsanto won a court ruling in canada recently over organic farmers. monsanto has a patent on a gene that makes crops resistant to its weed killer, round up. which means you can't plant a monsanto crop without paying them. so far so good. you also can't buy random corn. plant it. spray it with roundup. not pay monsanto. and claim your infringement is legal. and therefore free. cause wharrgarrbl. the thing that's extraordinary about this particular ruling is that the court ruled you owe license fees if some portion of your crop is fertilized by pollen blowing downwind from adjacent fields of monsanto crops. huh. think about that one for a minute. you grow a non-monsanto crop. you charge say 10x for the organic variety. but your crop was contaminated by gmo's released into the wild. so not only is the value of your crop destroyed. but to add insult to injury, monsanto can sue you for license fees. which seems absurd. seems like the organic farmers should be able to sue monsanto for damages to their crop by this invasive gmo. seems like they'd get the extra multipliers for negligence, foreseeable, and willful. sheehs.
vaganus
so i heard through the grapevine that some public figure was comparing a woman's vagina to a man's anus. and wondering how on earth someone could choose to stick their dick in the latter instead of the former. hrm. well. it's like this. there's a sort of fundamental flaw in the thinking. one so basic they might not be able to wrap their head around it. i explain. people get married because they fall in love. and for some people, next to that powerful emotion called love, type of genitalia really isn't all that important of a factor in choosing to share your life with someone. perhaps that's why the divorce rate for the anti-gay crowd is higher than for the tolerant crowd. ie they're choosing their life partners based on how great things are in the sack. instead of the strength of the emotional bond.
pukin
"gays will be safe at the olympics if they leave kids alone." huh. apparently this particular piece of dumbness is much much more prevalent than i have heretofore been able to fit in my brain. and i can put some really odd shaped ideas into my head. so anywho. let's be clear. gay men like sexual contact with gay men. gay women like sexual contact with gay women. pedophiles like sexual contact with children. although i don't know the actual statistics, i'm quite certain some pedophiles are gay. i assume rate is low because of all the hundreds of gay people i know, none of them are pedophiles. assuming that all gays are pedophiles is stupid. saying, oh you're gay - you must be a pedophile, is equivalent to saying, oh you're a woman - you must be a bad driver. oh you're polish - you must be stupid. oh you're black - you must be on welfare. oh you're asian - you must be smart. oh you're wearing a turban - you must be a terrorist. grow a brain morans.
nuke deal
if the reports of what's in this deal are true, and iran actually follows up on it, then there's really only one thing to say: holy crap. holy fucking crap. serendipity? perhaps. or more likely years of speaking softly turned out to be more effective than waving a big stick. go obama go. maybe we should get out of this man's way. one wonders what he may have accomplished if we had aided him instead of hindered him. heh. i'm reminded of the blue adpept. where he travels through a land that got half a prophecy: aid this man and half your number will die. so they tried their darndest to kill him. until they got the second half of the prophecy: hinder him and all are lost.
khobragade
you may not keep slaves in the united states. period. not negotiable. we fought a really nasty war on our own soil to establish that fact. fer cries zakes. anywho, devyani must not be very good at her job. cause if she was she would have been able to negotiate a resolution to the disagreement without it escalating to the point where armed officers start flashing badges and tazers. if only there was some word for this sort of activity. oh wait. there is. heh. besides, a competent diplomat should know the laws of the foreign land in which she is serving her country. get out. go home. don't come back. leave the slave.
abortion
if i were god and i blessed a woman with a baby in her belly and she killed it, i'd be pissed off. probably smite her with a bolt from the blue. or make her fat and ugly. or make her tits shrivel up. or transform her menstrual blood into epoxy. obviously i'd be more of an old testament sort of god. but i'm not a god at all. neither old or new. women who are pro-choice and have had an abortion have the same number of children on average as women who are pro-choice and have never had an abortion. so think about that for a second. the real god blesses a woman with a baby. and she kills it. and he gives her another one. his mercy is beyond my comprehension. so here's my question: if god can forgive a woman for killing a human fetus, why can't we?
snowden
is snowden a hero or a traitor? i kinda hate black and white questions. you're either with me or you're against me. there's no room for anything else. sigh. the world isn't binary. there are shades of gray. hell, there's a whole fucking spectrum of colors. anywho. snowden is both a traitor and a hero. he jumped on a grenade. it should kill him. but he saved us from being ignorant of what our government is doing. so hang him. and thank him. well, the other way around would be smarter.
traffic circles
there are a few traffic circles here in california. it's important that you know the right of way rules when you enter one. lest ye have an accident and your insurance company sends you a letter asking what the fuck were you doing you idiot?! or they'll just raise your rates 1000%. so anywho, traffic in the circle has right of way. so you can't just barrel into a circle as if it were part of your go straight street. and you certainly can't barrel over a car going round and round. especially not a car with kids in it. and most especially not my kids. get a clue. before you kill someone. thanks.
