suicide
so this morning i was removing the soccer ball ice pack from the freezer for g's lunch when the parmesan container leaped from its place on the shelf to the bottom ledge where it was neatly decapitated by the oj shelf on the door. i saw it jump when it was too late to stop the freezer door from closing. the frozen plastic crunch was clearly audible. my sleepy brain was awake enough to realize what had happened. but not awake enough to fully think through what was going to happen next. as i opened the freezer door to survey the damage, the parmesan container dumped its load all over the recessed refrigerator door handle, and into every nook and cranny in the door, all over the lowest ledge in the fridge, and all over the floor. parmesan is cheese. frozen parmesan isn't very hard to clean up. being more like powder than sticky gooey messy cheese. unfortunately, it didn't stay frozen. and became a sticky gooey mess of cheese all over the floor. which needed to be cleaned up. good thing we weren't running behind schedule this morning. or we'd've been late for school. stupid selfish suicider. only thinking of themselves. and never thinking of the affect their success might have on others. who simply wanted to eat them.