homeospermathy
so i was lying in bed next to the beautiful and talented alisa. feeling very relaxed. if you know what i mean. i was thinking that some small amount of my seed was spilled. and was aerosolized. and mixed with the air under the covers. which mixed with the air in the bedroom. which mixed with the air in the house. which mixed with the air in the neighborhood. and the county. and the state. and the nation. and the world. according to homeopathy, my seed gained potency with every dilution. which means that if homeopathy is correct, i've just knocked up every woman on earth. holy christ. you should take a pregnancy test right now. and then a paternity test. and if i'm the father of anyone's baby, i'll take back every mean thing i've ever said about the idiots who believe this shit.